Brewfus' Definitive Food Pairing Guide

Now look, for the last two years I've been trying to get you all to realize that I do have a semblance of seriousness when it comes to this whole craft beer thing. To do this, I decided to go on a bit of a hiatus and really dig down deep and try to lay a finger upon what it is I need to do to show that I am indeed a force to reckon with in this industry. So what conclusion did I come up with?

Food pairings, yo!

Seriously, what better way to show you that A) craft beer is serious business, and B) I know what the hell I'm talking about!? To do that, I spoke with all the experts in the world, and broke it down by which style best pairs with which kind of food item. I put a lot of man hours into this, but now you have a quick reference guide when you're out and about and think to yourself "what will go well with this sweaty 7-11 hot-dog?"

Kölsch, Cream Ale, Blonde Ale:

Try a burrito.




British-Style Bitter:

Try a burrito.



Pale Ale:


Try a burrito.




India Pale Ale:


Try a burrito.



Double/Imperial IPA:


Try a burrito.






Amber/Red Ale:


Try a burrito.






Scotch Ale/Wee Heavy:


Try a burrito.






Brown Ale/Altbier:


Try a burrito.






Abbey Dubbel:


Put this in your mouth and eat it.




Abbey Tripel, Strong Golden Ale:

You could try a soft taco, or a "Burrito that couldn't commit."



Old or Strong Ale:

Though nachos might be more appropriate.



Barley Wine:

Nah, fuck that. Burritos.



Porter:

I don't care what's in it, as long as its wrapped in a warm tortilla



Dry Stout:

Haaaaave you met my friend Burrito?



Sweet or Oatmeal Stout:

And his friend, burrito?



Imperial Stout:

When I'm done eating a burrito, I like to wash it down with another burrito.



Hefeweizen:

You know what burritos pair well with? More burritos.



American Wheat Ale:

For now on, all future beer reviews will earn a score from 1 to 5 burritos.



American Table Beer:

My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen burrito, I said "No, but I want a regular burrito later, so "Yeah."



Witbier:

Oh burrito, you so fine, you fine you blow my mind.



Dunkleweizen:

Halfway through writing this, I went and got lunch.




Weizenbock:

And then I got a burrito.



Classic Pilsner:

"A burrito is just a sleeping bag for ground beef"



Helles, Dortmunder:

Have you ever met someone who doesn't like burritos?



Oktoberfest, M arzen, Vienna:

If you have, you should bludgeon them to death.



Amber Lager:

WITH A BURRITO!



Dark Lager, Dunkel, Schwarzbier:

You know who hated burritos?



Maibock/Pale Bock:

Hitler. That is who.



Dopplebock:

So eat a burrito, with all of your beers.



Oud Bruin, Flanders, Gueze, Wild Ale, Lambic:

Because even little hamsters love burritos.




Because the only way to get credibility in this game, is to put some food on that shit. Beer is as good as wine, right?

I got fries on it.

19 comments:

  1. Nice! I really liked the Luniz reference too

    ReplyDelete
  2. Four out of five people experience some degree of Upper/ Lower Back Pain at some point in their lives. In fact, back CBD oil for back pain is one of the most common reasons that people call in sick at work or make an appointment to see their doctor. There are several common causes for back pain that is bad enough to interfere with a person's daily routine.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I can't say I was ever in the "cool club" while I was growing up. And not much has changed since I entered the realms of business. hemp

    ReplyDelete
  4. Are we really doing Health wellness today? In this article, you will learn the difference between worksite wellness and employee health improvement.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Admiring the time and effort you put into your blog and detailed information you offer!.. CBD Gummies

    ReplyDelete
  6. You have noted very useful details! PS. nice web site. “Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.” by Tom Robbins.. food bloggers to follow

    ReplyDelete
  7. Some times its a pain in the ass to read what blog owners wrote but this site is really user pleasant! . is weed bad

    ReplyDelete
  8. Are we really doing simply cbd oil wellness today? In this article, you will learn the difference between worksite wellness and employee health improvement.

    ReplyDelete
  9. But wanna comment on few general things, The website style is perfect, the content material is really good : D. trada casino

    ReplyDelete
  10. As soon as I detected this internet site I went on reddit to share some of the love with them. Casino YouTube

    ReplyDelete
  11. It’s exhausting to seek out knowledgeable individuals on this topic, but you sound like you recognize what you’re speaking about! Thanks coinswitch

    ReplyDelete
  12. It’s a shame you don’t have a donate button! I’d most certainly donate to this fantastic blog! I suppose for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to brand new updates and will share this blog with my Facebook group. Chat soon! Hardly trainable dogs

    ReplyDelete
  13. When 2010 health care reform became law, child-only policies in Georgia Home stopped. Will a new bill bring this option back to parents who want their children covered?

    ReplyDelete
  14. But wanna comment on few general things, The website style is perfect, the content material is really good : D. cresus casino

    ReplyDelete
  15. so much good information on here, : D. miami dice

    ReplyDelete
  16. Aw, this was an exceptionally nice post. In concept I would like to place in writing such as this moreover – spending time and actual effort to create a excellent article… but so what can I say… I procrastinate alot through no indicates find a way to go completed. cloudbet

    ReplyDelete
  17. as soon as I noticed this internet site I went on reddit to share some of the love with them. https://futurehealthlife.com

    ReplyDelete
  18. Thanks for sharing superb informations. Your website is very cool. I am impressed by the details that you have on this site. It reveals how nicely you perceive this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for more articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched everywhere and just couldn’t come across. What a great web-site. https://healthlifeservices.com

    ReplyDelete